This day came sooner than I planned. But if I’m being fair, I guess I’m rarely ready for Ellie to grow up. She already seems so ahead of the game, communicating beyond her years, understanding more than a 2-year-old should, being so in tune with herself and her surroundings. It’s freaky sometimes – but its obvious she’s ready for this next step, even if I’m not: PRESCHOOL.
I sit here with puffy eyes, still sniffling and holding back tears. My main goal today was to keep my composure while dropping her off so that she wouldn’t see me upset. Be strong for your kid: it sounds so simple. She’s so much braver than I was (or am) and although she kept asking to hold my hand and stay with her a little longer (I stayed a total of 30 minutes), she didn’t lose it when I left – only I did. Seeing her sitting at that table with a dozen other 2-year-olds about to have snack, all I could think was: where did my baby go!? I’m so proud of her and so damn sad at the same time. That quote about wearing your heart on the outside once you have a kid – yea, well my heart is currently at preschool and I feel lost without it. I can’t wait for this evening to know how her first day was. And to give her a million hugs and kisses. Oh and we promised her a “surprise present” at the end of her first day which she is super excited about. Hey, whatever works ;).
Last night I laid out everything we were packing, took a couple pictures before Ellie discovered me and decided picture taking was done, and then we went through item by item talking about what she would be bringing to school the next day. It was an accidental really good idea. She was so excited by all the big girl stuff and I could see her little mind wrapping around the idea of everything that was going to happen the following day. I’ve learned that Ellie likes preparation, she likes to know what is coming and what to expect, and there is a lot to prepare for with this big step.
Looking at the spread of things I’m sending her with, I got the feeling I’m going to be “that Mom” at preschool. That Mom that will only allow her mineral sunscreen to be applied, that will request that her child eat her packed organic snacks over the provided Ritz crackers and goldfish, that sends her daughter with organic sheets and underwear… I can’t help it. When the options are there, there’s no other choice but the best for my kid.
Here is what I sent her with:
++ Plus a blankie and stuffed “friend” of course
As for meals, I wanted to give her a lunch that she would be excited about, while being healthy too of course. I packed organic mac & cheese with peas, organic uncured beef sausage, organic grapes and cheese and a bite of an organic peanut butter protein bar. The snack is her favorite Annie’s organic cheddar bunny snack mix.
Okay so how much time did I kill writing this post today? Not bad. Looking at the clock, I only have about 3 hours until I see her and find out how (awesome) her day was!!