At the end of last year there was a meme going around about 2017 being the year of the cocoon and 2018 the year of the butterfly. I was stoked. This was the year I had been waiting for. I‘ve been feeling for years that “big things” were coming but hadn’t seen much momentum. I was so ready for things to take flight, so ready to be a butterfly 😉
Then 2018 happened.
And there wasn’t so much flying so to speak.
Apparently there was still a lot that needed to happen, change, and evolve before the butterfly could soar. (Also I guess technically butterflies don’t come out of the cocoon flying, they need foundational energy before taking flight… a lot of work is required to pump blood into their wings).
So while it wasn’t a year of huge external movement like I had expected, it was a critical year.
A year of foundational work, internal healing, personal growth.
Surprisingly, I took a step “back” in many ways. I released some self-imposed pressure. I worked a lot less. Made less money. Stayed home with the kids more than ever before. Meditated more. Started journaling again. Took social media breaks. Committed to gratitude and positivity practices. Traveled more (with and without the kids). Became a Kindergarten room parent and art volunteer. Became an obsessive self-help podcast listener. Made some new friends. Saw healers. Explored past trauma, old patterns and started the process of healing those wounds. Started following moon patterns and fell in love with crystals and angel therapy cards. Took more time for me, right where I was.
So, maybe “back” was really forward?
Another example of that is how I’m learning to say No. At first that doesn’t sound like typical forward momentum stuff but for a chronic people pleaser like me, it’s a massive leap. I’ve had a lot of opportunities this year to practice making self-honoring choices. Even if it means turning down work opportunities, missing social gatherings, and letting friendships end. Learning to ask the question “does this serve my highest good?” might have been my biggest lesson of the year.
Whether the happenings big or small, this year was important. Sometimes it’s hard to be patient with your dreams. You want to just run full speed ahead. But there’s so much richness in the stepping back, slowing down, growing the roots, shifting into a more positive place. It’s essential for the next step.
I think 2018 was intense for a lot of us. I hope we can see it for what it taught us and provided. Everything I hear about 2019 is exciting. I feel it – do you?
I love this video of Kari Samuel’s – if you want to feel total enthusiasm for the year ahead, check it out here.
Happy New Year everyone! So much love and light to you and your year ahead!!